How to Make the Best of Your Hot As Hell Phoenix Hike

November 9, 2020

This last summer brought a few really good things- excess ice cream, fun photo sessions, a couple of flights, and (most importantly), time for an adventure in the great outdoors of the immediate Phoenix area with Brett. This being said – and I realize this may sound dramatic when I say this but I’m going to say it anyway- it’s LITERALLY THE HOTTEST I’VE BEEN AND EVER WILL BE IN MY LIFE.

Look, I grew up in Los Angeles with generally air condition-less summers and have spent years getting acquainted with my sweat mustache in Charleston, SC, so I feel like I know a *little* about heat.. and yes. None of that touches the casual fiery hell that is a late summer day in Phoenix.

I woke up this particular morning and looked out the window and decided to go for it despite the high being about 115 degrees. I’ll say that again- ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTEEN ENTIRE DEGREES. Like what in the entire what? Turns out it was a record-breaking week of weather so I guess it just was all-around not anyone’s idea of a regular day to be out and about. Nevertheless, I went out and made way to Papago Park by foot- it took about one stifling hour, an iced coffee (more on that in a min), and a couple of photo-inspired pit stops each way, plus the actual hike itself.

With that being said,, I had a grand time waltzing around the stifling and possibly(??) life threatening heat with my camera. How, you ask? I actually don’t have any life changing news to report BUT here’s the small list of the things I’ve decided are imperative to a good time when you’re having a hot time that nobody asked for:

  1. Wake up as early as possible. If you’re traveling (like I was), let any shred of energy reminiscent of jet-lag be your friend and get out the house as soon as the sun is up. Otherwise, channel your inner early bird and GTFO your abode and get out there. It’s absolutely wild how much more tolerable the weather is before like, 10am. I kind of always *knew* that deserts do this dramatic pendulum swing of temperature changes but I honestly didn’t realize how seriously to take this until now.
  2. Bring something to drink + all the extra ice you can muster. This might not be actually great advice because I hear caffeine is actually super uncool to take in if you’re worried about dehydration, but my bad advice to you is that if you’re a caffeine-depending ding dong like me, take your iced coffee with extra, extra ice so that it melts and becomes your round two beverage. Also savor those little ice cubes like the little nuggets of sweltering reprieve they are. Fun moderately-related fact: you can actually drink too much water- don’t drink too much all at once.
  3. Wear light colors and footwear with breathing vents (I missed this one so it’s more of a future reminder for myself). Don’t wear your cute boots. Don’t wear your cute boots. Don’t wear your cute boots. (In case you didn’t pick up on this, I wore my cute boots and my feet were unhappy, hot, and I am fairly certain still covered in a thin veil of dust). Wearing the right shoes is a big one, but I also learned on this hike that more is less in the world of covering your skin with thin layers of clothing. I am also here to report that I learned about this the hard way and, despite my lifelong claims of “only tanning and not burning”, I was practically molting for the following week. Not a good look~
  4. Bring your socially-distanced friend along for the outdoor sauna party. I swear you honestly probably even won’t notice that the air is like sitting inside an aggressive blow-dryer if you’re in good company:)
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